Back
in 2004, I was diagnosed bipolar with psychotic features, which began a long
journey of taking prescription drugs. It took a lot of years suffering through
different kinds of medications. I would suffer mostly of weight gain,
headaches, fatigue, depression, the list goes on.
For
a period of time, I was in denial about my illness and stopped taking the meds
on and off, because one: I thought I didn’t have a mental illness, that my mind
was just messin’ with me (wrong) and two: I suffered from so many side effects,
it wasn’t funny.
Unfortunately
after so many bipolar episodes, I had to come to grips that I was in fact sick,
I had a mental illness and I needed medication for it. Luckily over the years I
was able to find a combination of drugs that work for me.
Through
all this, my writing grew. I was finishing on my fourth novel and knew I had to
think of something new to write. I always love to bring awareness to mental illnesses
and depression and always try to incorporate that in my writing.
One
day I was thinking of all the side effects prescription medication can have.
You know the ones on the commercials that take two minutes to say? I was
remembering when I first started taking them. I was still hearing voices at the
time, not of my own. During my bipolar attacks, I would imagine things that
weren’t there. And deciphering what was real and what wasn’t.
Out
in my backyard, I was sitting at my patio and trying to think of something new
to write. And all of a sudden, I heard “Just do it!” These are the first three
words of FIX ME. I kept hearing “just do it” and so I sat down and wrote the words
and spilling out came Pen’s dilemma, taking FIX and wanting to quit. But she
had a reason not to, her friend Nate. But the catch to everything was that Nate
wasn’t real. He was just a side effect of the drug.
It’s
very easy for me to write a character in mental turmoil because I experience it
on a daily basis. Every day is different. Sometimes, I’ll have my good days and
sometimes bad.
So
when it came to write Pen’s story, it came very natural to me. And everything
was flowing how it was meant to. I wrote it in 3 months, revised it and sent it
off. It took a long time to finally connect, but that’s a different story.
Sometimes
it’s really hard to come up with a great idea. I know when I try to force
things, it never works out that way. You have to be open for something new,
something fresh. Some ways to get ideas: take a walk (without music and listen
to nature instead) Sign off the computer and sit outside with a pen and paper.
Doing it old school really helps sometimes.
Also
too, I call it “spontaneous writing” where you sit down and write whatever your
hearts desire, cats, I love cats (I could write a novel on it) Flowers, I want
to keep trying. A poem, poems are great. (that was just an example of
spontaneous writing.) It’s easy and fun and you can get a lot of ideas from
that too.
Another
fun thing to do, other than read what’s out there, is read all the new release
blurbs. I’m not telling you to copy their ideas, but just get a feel of what’s
out there, what’s working. Think of something you haven’t come across.
One
thing I’ve learned is that loving your idea and letting it grow on paper is a
wonderful gift. Even if you never get it published, it was something you were
committed to for a long period of time. And remember writing your ideas down
will always be a good idea.
